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[heirlift]

text voice video action	fresh.heir
John Egbert	Homestuck
role	Familiar
residence	Leshy
info ○ permissions ○ housing ○ familiar ○ overflow ○ opt-out

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Comments

[heirlift]

no, it's a spade. like uhhhh

♠

conveniently, all their relationships correspond to what we use for card suits? <3 for normal relationships, <3< for hate dating, <> is i guess bffs but romantic but also no kissing, and I don't really get c3<, that one is weird.

ugh god what is it about this troll romance shit that makes you want to explain it! i'm not a troll, i don't date trolls! but whatever, now you know i guess? that's it, i'm banning myself from talking about stupid troll stuff!

let's talk about you. at least you got better? how are you holding up?

[kyley_b]

yeah i see that now.

right right the mediator role, that one sounds fucking thankless. i feel like that one makes more sense in communal societies. which we sort of are, here. huh.

you could date trolls if you wanted to, they're cool.

yeah, yeah i'm ok. mostly i just feel like a really bad person for how i treated people.

[heirlift]

[ He absolutely does not want to date a troll, but that is a topic for another time. ]

i don't think a bad person would come and apologize without any prompting. a bad person would laugh and tell people they were overreacting if they were upset. have you been doing that?

[kyley_b]

no, no of course not.

you're not pissed?

[heirlift]

no. i'm a little confused but that's pretty normal lately. but i'm not mad.

you're my friend, dude. you're not going to get rid of me that easy. :B

[kyley_b]

yeah, i understand that feeling.

ok, good. :)

[heirlift]

it seems to be pretty common here! but i'd rather write an essay about trollmance before i start talking about the stupid fox again soooo...

hey! at least you got to see me do one of my windy things! i don't get a chance to show that off much. that's fun, right?

[kyley_b]

not a fan, right.

i didn't even realise you could do that shit! you're like a superhero!

[heirlift]

i can do a lot more! though some of it's pretty destructive so i try not to do it too much.

did you think the god tier thing was just for show? i mean the costume is cool and all but it's way more than that!

[kyley_b]

i had no idea!

i guess i never really thought about it because you don't actually talk about it much. like dirk is always 'bro i'll wedgie your soul' and shit but you never really bring it up.

[heirlift]

yeah it's not really a thing that comes up in casual conversation. like, oh btw, i can turn into an untouchable breeze and also summon huge-ass tornadoes!

i'm also kind of used to everyone knowing... i think they teach kids in school about me and dirk and the rest of us, which is really weird to think about?

[kyley_b]

dude. so cool.

do they? not in my universe, sorry. but now i can claim i knew you guys if i ever wind up in your world.

[heirlift]

well yeah. if i even exist in your universe, i'm still just a normal dude there. doing really normal dude stuff.

i didn't do any of the history book stuff until after the earth was destroyed the first time.

[kyley_b]

you're still a pretty normal dude, dude.

riiiiight. and then you're like, a god, alongside some screaming trolls, and dirk is still a hot asshole.

[heirlift]

you know what i mean though! i'd probably have a dumb boring office job and a briefcase and a whole closet full of pressed white shirts and a bajillion ties!

[ Just like his dad... ]

god... if you think dirk is a hot asshole, i hope you can meet his ecto-siblings someday. they're all hot! all of them! it's super unfair.

[kyley_b]

lol maybe. or maybe you'd still be cool.

i absolutely think that. oh right, he has family sorta. and you were friends?

[heirlift]

aww dude. you're cool too!

yeah! dave and rose are my really good friends! roxy is really cool too but i haven't known her as long as those two.

i think you'd get along with rose, she's the one who's super into psychology.

[kyley_b]

we're both awesome.

maybe someday i'll get lucky and be able to meet them.

[heirlift]

you'd be lucky but i'd be screwed! tag team psychoanalysis...

promise me if you ever meet a blonde woman named rose lalonde that you will only use your combined forces for good!

[kyley_b]

it would be good for you!

i promise. i only ever use my powers for good already!

[heirlift]

you never know. she might corrupt you. i care about her very much but also she can be a little evil.

[ By "evil" he means "she calls him out". ]

[kyley_b]

trust me, i can handle evil.

[heirlift]

you say that now...

well, maybe we'll find out someday!